It's Time

This week it seems as if the world is going crazy. There is more violence, more hatred, more division than I have ever seen in my 34 years of life. In the midst of my fear, all I can feel is "it's time."

Time for what you ask? 

I can't speak for anyone else, but it's time for me to humble myself and repent for not loving the way I should. I haven't loved people the way I should, and I definitely haven't loved God above all. My heart is grieved and broken, I'm disappointed that I've let life steal my joy. I've let circumstances control me. I've let the trials of life steal my focus. I've let myself get discouraged, which has taken me away from the work I'm called to do. I'm called to love. I'm called to use my circumstances as a testimony to encourage someone struggling as well. I'm supposed to love people to Jesus.

It's also time for the church to tear down the religious walls dividing us all. If we can't stand as a united body, there truly is NO HOPE for this lost and dying world. We carry the hope within us. We have the answer to all of the hurt and pain. We know the healer and the comforter. We know the mender of broken hearts and the One who provides the peace that passes all understanding. It is time we share Him with our neighbors, friends, coworkers, and family. 

It's time to pray. PRAY like we've never prayed before. Prayer changes things. I've seen it. 

It's time. It's time. IT'S TIME!!! It's not going to be easy, but in our weakness, He is strong.

No more playing church. It's time to BE the church. 

The song that has been on my heart today is "Hosanna." This is my heart's cry:

Heal my heart and make it clean. Open up my eyes to the things unseen. Show me how to love like you have loved me.

Break my heart for what breaks yours. Everything I am for your kingdoms cause as I walk from Earth into eternity.

2 Chronicles 7:14

if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

John 16:33

These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will[a] have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.

Sometimes You Get a Concussion

So the past week has been difficult. It  doesn't help when you give yourself a minor concussion. The nausea, dizziness, and headaches have been zero fun. 
To be honest though, I'm just in a really odd faze in life right now. I honestly have nothing to complain about, so don't think this is going to be one of those posts. I think I'm just at a point where I want more. I posted a Facebook status about one sided friendships not that long ago, and I've talked to several of my close friends about my issues. The thing I've realized is maybe I expect too much from people. Perhaps I am just built to check in with the people I care about periodically and try and make time for coffee dates and such. Maybe that's not normal. It's just very bazaar to me. I'm not expecting anything crazy. After all most of my friends have husbands and families of their own. I guess my thing is I've always wanted there to be an effort to check in and see what's going on in my life..how I'm doing from time to time. I treasure the people I have in my life that I can go months without seeing, but when we get together we just pick right up where we left off. Those friendships are my FAVORITE.
There are so many situations that have really been weighing on my heart lately. They mostly have to do with situations I'll never understand this side of Heaven. I just hate it when people hurt. I hate it even more that I can't help or take that hurt away. I just wish so much that the 'whys' of life could be answered, but again I know that's just not the way it works. Who knows, maybe even if we knew, we couldn't understand.
One song that's been ministering to me a lot lately is "Forever." It's on Kari Jobe's newest album. I've honestly been listening to it over and over and just crying.  "One final breath he gave as Heaven looked away. The Son of God was laid in darkness. A battle in the grave, the war on death was waged, the power of Hell forever broken. The ground began to shake. The stone was rolled away. His perfect love could not be overcome.Now death where is your sting? Our resurrected King has rendered you DEFEATED!"  I'm so thankful that while death hurts so much, Jesus did defeat it forever when he shed his blood and gave His life for us all. Such great love that I'm forever and ever grateful for.
I guess the point of all this is sometimes life hurts, a lot of times it's so very hard. Sometimes you give yourself a concussion and it seems life will never be normal again without the dizziness and blurred vision. The truth is though that life is beautiful. God loves us, all of us. He wants to bless His children.  In our hardest times he bandages our wounds and carries us through the times we think we'll never overcome. After all greater is He that is in me than he that is in the world. 1 John 4:4 We can and will overcome through Christ. 
I'm not even sure this made any sense. I'll blame my concussion. ;-)

A Legacy of Light

I actually have a lot to say. It seems like it's been forever since I've had a quiet moment to myself to write. So much has been going on that I don't even know where to begin.
I guess I'll start with a status I posted a while back on Facebook:This past week has started making me think about what my legacy. What do people say about me? Have I helped everyone I could? Does Christ's love shine through me? If not, that needs to change. We are the light afterall to this dark world. I hope I am doing my part to bring hope and love. It's kind of silly what prompted my thought that day, but here goes. A well known DJ, named Kidd Kraddick passed away almost 3 weeks ago. It was amazing to me how people all around the world were calling in and talking about all this stuff he did for others behind the scenes, and then of course the work he did through his charity Kidd's Kids. That had me thinking, what is my legacy? Am I truly doing everything within my power to help others? Am I a true friend? Do people see Christ's love in me? Do I bring light to this dark and dying world? My husband responded and said that our legacy will be through our boys. Of course that's true, but why should it be limited to that? I work and interact with so many people throughout the day. It's sounds so cliche, but do they see Jesus in me?
I truly want people to walk away from me knowing that I'm different. I want to live in such a way that everyone wonders what's the joy that radiates off of her?
Nothing brings me more joy than leading worship at church. It has nothing to do with the fact that there's a microphone in my hand. It's the fact that God's presence transforms. His presence renews my strength, gives me peace, fills me with joy. Honestly if I could walk around singing out loud all day, I would be a lot happier. Unfortunately that's frowned upon at work. ;-) So I just have to settle with a song in my heart. (SUPER CHEESEY, I know.)

I guess the main point of what's been on my mind is we've found the truth. Jesus has filled us with His peace and He's given us Hope and Love. Why would we not want to share that with our friends, coworkers...even the people we're not all that fond of? Honestly those are the people that need Jesus the most. Well I have a lot more to say, but I will save that for another day! :-)

Matthew 5:14-16 “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden.  Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven."

Willing Heart

As this year continues to tick by, I've realized, (well I've always known,) I want SO MUCH MORE out of life. Don't get me wrong, if I look back at my relationship with God last year, and where I am this year, it is definitely in a fresh and new place. The truth of the matter is I'm still not satisfied. How could I EVER be satisfied?!?! I want to DO more! I want to BE more! I want to SEE more! I want to LEARN more. Is this making sense?
I guess what I'm trying to say is that until Christ returns, I don't want to ever be satisfied with where I am. I want to constantly be moving and growing. I never want to be complacent when it comes to God and His works.
Last year was the first year I didn't give up on a year devotional plan. I actually made it through the whole thing. So this year, I have started a new one, but along with the devotion, I am also reading several chapters of Psalms each night. Once I'm done with Psalms, we'll see where I decide to read next. :0) You see, I'm saturating my heart and mind with His word. That knowledge is SO important, and I can't even begin to tell you what an encouragement this has been to me over the past couple of months.
Prayer has always been so very important to me, but this year I've taken my conversations with God to a new level. You see, in reading His word, He makes it very clear that He wants to hear from us. Therefore, I have been storming Heaven with pleas for miracles, peace, rest, joy...You get the idea. :0) Prayer is such a gift, but more than that..it's such a powerful tool. Prayer truly changes things, and this year I am praying and believing that God will move mountains. Miracles are not a thing of the past, folks. I am a one, after all! :)
Thanks and praise...wow, this is a big one!! How can anyone go through a single day and not thank God for loving them? I've noticed that even my praise and worship is becoming more intimate. Honestly there's probably not a song I haven't cried too. Each Sunday and Wednesday, even the times when I feel like I need a break, God gives me the strength I need to lead worship, but often times He even gives me a scripture to share. These scriptures often result in me crying, but it's just awesome to be able to share what God is showing me and my heart through worship.
I guess to sum up this post I am SUPER excited about what God is doing in my life! I am EXCITED that I'm not satisfied with just going through the motions and just sitting in the seat. I want to do His work. I DESPERATELY want Him to use me! The coolest part about it..He IS using ME!!! You see all it takes is a willing heart!!